I’m a Night Owl

I’ve been thinking about this for a while and I’ve got to say, I’m tired of being shamed for being a night owl. People look at me sideways when I tell them I don’t want to have to be anywhere before noon. I’m not working anymore, so I go to bed around 2am and sleep until 11am. It’s my body’s circadian rhythm, it’s perfectly natural, and it does not make me a deviant. I’m not lazy and I’m not a freak.

I don’t appreciate how smug some of the early birds can be. They’re up at 6am, they’ve had their coffee and been to the gym by 8am, and they LOVE to brag about it. They also love to give me the third degree when they hear me say, “I don’t do mornings.” They’ll ask personal questions and even raise an eyebrow or contort their face in disapproval and say, “Oh, REALLY,” as if I’m some kind of abhorrent anomaly.

We night owls don’t do that to you early birds. Can you imagine us shaming you for being up at 6am and questioning you about your sleeping habits? I can just hear it, “Oh dear, up at 6am, hmm, I see,” and then we give you that same unaccepting look. Early birds even have their own saying about getting the worm, but what do the night owls get? Nothing.

Night owl shaming has been going on for a long time. Aristotle said, “It is well to be up before daybreak, for such habits contribute to health, wealth and wisdom.” Ben Franklin had the nerve to say, “Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.” He also said, “The early morning has gold in its mouth.” He was smug.

Whether you’re a night owl or an early bird, you can’t help it. It’s built into your genetic code. We’re all marching to the beat of our own DNA, so stop the early bird propaganda and lose the smug face too, it’s not a good look. No more judgment and no badges of honor. Me and you, we’re like apples and oranges and both are delicious.

Written by Susan Codeglia (at 1am)

The Routine

When exactly did this morning routine thing happen? It starts innocently enough in your 20’s with the obligatory face wash or shower, brushing your teeth and then grabbing a cup of coffee, but then it starts creeping insidiously into your life and before you know it you’ve got your very own morning routine. By the time you’re 62 and no longer working, you’ve innocently committed to a pattern that you can’t seem to shake and it’s time consuming.

After the face wash and teeth brushing, don’t forget to moisturize. It’s time to head to the kitchen and you’re like Tom Cruise in the movie “Cocktail,” mixing together a double shot of Citrucil and Metamucil. Then a sinus rinse to help your allergies, followed by your morning meds. You even suck on a sugar-free Vitamin C lozenge to keep colds at bay. Finally, you plop into your recliner chair with a little nosh and your iPad to read the morning news to see if you should carry on with your day or if all hell’s breaking loose.

Eventually, you go about your day and you might even be productive. If you’re really crazy you’ll do something unpredictable. The hours go by and then guess what? It’s time for your nightly routine. That’s right. It’s just like the morning routine, only backwards. And so it goes. On and on.

Written by Susan Codeglia 7/9/18